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Malifoo - Heart Stops Beating

September 14, 2018
Have you ever had an out-of-body experience? The Bearded Man has had several. In his younger days, he loved the movie “Caddyshack”, and on one particularly rainy day, he decided to tempt fate and golf in a lightning storm. Considering the tragic ending of the scene in the movie, he knew carrying metal clubs in an open field in lightning was pretty much a recipe for disaster. It’s not that he had a death wish per se, it’s just that he has a weird sense of humor. Despite the pouring rain, he played pretty well - he even made it to the last hole. He sank the final putt, and looked up to the heavens, as if to challenge God. KA-BOOM!! He was struck down by a bolt of lightning, and he fell to the ground - cardiac arrest. If anyone was around, they would have thought that he had just died instantly, but of course, no one was there. He opened his eyes, and he was on a dance floor in Ibiza. Beautiful people all around him extended their hands, and picked him up in the bright sunshine as the beach party raged on. He had gone to heaven, and Malifoo was playing in the background. Suddenly, the music started slowing down like a massive tape stop, and his vision began to blur. Even though he was already awake, he opened his eyes again, and he was in the dark, in the rain, back on the golf course. He had been given a second chance. It seems God has always had a soft spot for The Bearded Man, probably because she thinks he’s cute.

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